To Maui! And Beyond!

This is cross-posted from my other blog: runnercraig.com

Ok, so if you know me at all, you know that I am a Nervous Nellie. I battle anxiety and panic attacks, and since I quit drinking eight years ago, I have not flown. Translation: After a few Bloody Mary’s, I believe I can fly. Without, I wasn’t sure I could ever fly again.
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I flew. Wait, what?

I flat cannot believe it has been a year since I blogged on this site. Sorry… I know that makes me a terrible blogger.

Still at my “new” job, still love it. Still on the daily Klonopin and Buspirone, and my world grows larger each day.

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Something’s missing…

It’s a weird feeling. Maybe it’s Stockholm Syndrome, or maybe just the fact that I’ve lived with anxiety and panic for fifteen solid years. But now that the medication has all but removed my panic, I sometimes feel like something is missing. That I don’t feel normal.

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So Far, So Good…

It has been two weeks since I started the Klonopin. I still feel really good. Not perfect, but really good. I can still get a little wiggy (is that a word?) at about the 11th hour. Just a faint anxiety, letting me know it’s almost time to take another pill. Not scary withdrawal anxiety, or “Holy shit, I’m going to die!!” panic. Just a little nervousness if I happen to be doing nothing about eleven hours after I take my meds. If I am busy, like I was last night, I won’t even notice- until the alarm on my phone tells me it’s pilltime.

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Cured…

Or am I?  This may go down as the shortest blog ever, or maybe I am just getting started.

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Even More Medicated…

When I last left you, I was psyching myself up to take a Klonopin. The doctor had recommended 1 mg morning and 1 mg night. I asked her to start more slowly than that.

Boy, am I glad I did.

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Medicated…

Ok, so let me start off by saying that I have been to years of cognitive therapy to resolve my condition without medication. That worked so well that my wife came to me after one of my freak-outs at a friend’s house and told me that I needed meds, or she didn’t think she could take it anymore.

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